Panic Picnic

What the fuck is happening here? 

Excited for my first day at work, I called my senior to ask if the company provided a laptop. She told me to bring my own. 

I had a gigantic laptop, a 17.5-inch gaming monster that screamed for attention wherever I took it. 

I arrived at the office five minutes late, as usual, no matter the day’s importance. 

Introspection time: The fun part is, the more important the day, the greater my talent for being late. It’s like my brain runs on anxiety and comic timing. 

Years ago, during tuition, I was supposed to write chemistry notes on the board at 5 a.m., but I ended up arriving after class started. I was embarrassed. That’s me. 

With that memory lingering in my mind, I shifted focus back to my first day. 

The manager showed me my corner and asked me to settle in. I sat next to a few people, all busy and focused. 

As soon as I opened my laptop, everyone noticed. While settling in, an ops manager introduced me to the team. I felt excited to meet new faces and energy. 

Returning to my seat, I realized everyone around me was deeply involved in their work. As I sat idle for almost an hour, panic started to build up. A lot of thoughts entered my head, like a herd of sheep rushing into a field in the morning. 

I was so lost in my thoughts that I almost blacked out. 

Then I felt a pat on my back. 

“Prajwal, hey!” 

I turned around. My manager was calling me. 

She took me to the meeting room and asked for my documents. I had packed them carefully the day before. She went through them and said, “Prajwal, I can’t find your degree.” 

I said, “I don’t have one.” 

She looked surprised. “Aren’t you a civil engineer? Didn’t you graduate?” 

I told her, “No, I’m still in college.” 

She was shocked. “Why didn’t you say that yesterday?” 

I said, “You might have seen it on my LinkedIn profile.” 

At that moment, I was extremely nervous. We exchanged silence for a while, and she asked me to wait outside so she could reconfirm my job status. 

That moment felt like glass shattering. My confidence broke completely. 

All the morning excitement got zapped out of me. I stared at my laptop, confused, lost, and pretty sure my gaming laptop looked more prepared for the job than I did. 

Time slowly slipped by. By then, it was already 2 p.m. 

My colleague sitting next to me asked, “Is that a gaming laptop?” 

The silence finally broke. 

I said, “Yes.” 

He asked if I played any games. I told him I played GTA 5 often. 

“That’s crazy, dude. Would you mind sharing that game with me?” 

I said, “Bro, it’s more than 100 GB. Do you have enough space?” 

We both laughed. The conversation kept going. 

We had lunch together. He asked if I smoke. I said no, but I still accompanied him. 

Believe me, Sutta Chai Break is the real icebreaker. 

Just listening to colleagues complain and joke about their jobs gave me perspective. It lifted my mood. 

After lunch and some good conversations, we returned to the office. Once again, everyone was focused on their work, and that’s when my manager called me to the meeting room again. 

By now, I had already prepared myself mentally to be sent back home. 

She said, “Since you haven’t graduated yet, I can offer you an internship.” 

I smiled. “That’s totally fine with me.” 

She explained my work. I had to call a number of sales executives in Delhi every day and ensure they completed their tasks. 

It sounded simple enough. I could do that. 

As the day progressed, I got a SIM card and office phone to start making calls. I was finally ready: a mission, a mobile, and my professional number. 

I wasn’t confused anymore. 

Sometimes we hesitate to do things because we look for comfort and similarities everywhere we go. Stepping out of our comfort zone suffocates us because we fear the unknown. But there’s always a solution to the problems that surround us. We just need to find a way to deal with them. 

The truth is, the commonalities we crave are the ones that keep us together. Deep inside, we all want icebreakers because everyone hates being awkward. Half of our lives are spent being awkward. 

Now, I’m calling everyone, but no one is picking up. 

My manager is asking me to call in front of her so she can observe my convincing skills.
I’m so freaked out right now. 

Read Chapter 3. 

Peace Out